I wonder where the economy is going and how it’s all going to work out.  I have complete faith that it will work out. I believe so strongly in America that I know we can withstand just about anything.  I just wonder where it’s headed.  Some people are saying that this may well be the end of capitalism as we know it, and with the government getting involved in private business, it just might be.  I wish I had a crystal ball and could see where it’s all going to come out.  I have plans on buying a house in a year or so, I’m hoping that there will be credit available to do that. It’s not like I’m looking at Wilmington NC real estate. I remember the 70’s when interest rates were 10 and 12%. So, see, we’ve been through this before and things have worked out okay.  I do worry though.  I much prefer it when I know what’s going on and have a plan in place. Okay, enough depressing stuff. I just have things on my mind tonight and that’s just one of the many problems I’m dwelling on.

Well, it’s the last day of  a 4 day weekend.  I’m kind of sad but I got everything done I wanted to this weekend so that’s good.  This morning I just have to clean house then I can veg all day.  I’m very excited about that.  I’m not sure exactly what I’ll do but I’ll find some way to amuse myself.   I’m actually thinking of looking at furniture.  The furniture we have is really crappy.  Since we are moving in a year or so I don’t want to spend a lot of money but I’m up for checking out some discount furniture. Maybe we’ll see.

I do have to go grocery shopping and to pick up some dog food. I also want to make the dogs biscuits. I haven’t made their biscuits in a long time and they prefer mine over store bought. I’ll do that today. Well, nothing is getting done with me sitting here blogging. Time to get my butt moving.

My goal over this 4 day weekend was to get all of my schoolwork done so that I don’t have to worry about school anymore.  My secret goal was to get it done by today so that tomorrow I can lie around and read my book and not feel guilty.  Well, success!!!  I have one little presentation to finish up which will be done before I go to bed, and that is it.  I am done.  You do not know how happy that makes me.  What a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.  It is truly a relief and it was worth every second I spent this weekend doing it.  It’s right about now I wish I belonged to the wine of the month club. I would bust out a bottle and have a drink. But I do have one more assignment to finish and once that’s done I can really and truly relax. I’m so happy. I’m off now to finish my last assignment.

I went and saw Bodies - The Exhibition today.  I have one thing to say.  Wow!!!  It was so cool.  The exhibit has been in Honolulu for about 4 or 5 months now and I’ve been wanting to get down to see it, but with school and work I just didn’t have a chance.  So since I had a 4 day weekend I decided to use today to go see it.  I figured everyone would be out shopping and I was basically right.

Anyway, this exhibit was amazing.  You can see the entire nervous system, the arterial/veinous system, the lungs, everything.  It was incredible. They even had this display of fetuses.  Wow!!!  I’m really, really glad I went.  I’ve been asking everyone I know if they want to go and they were all grossed out by it.  But the way the preserve the bodies makes them look like plastic.  I had to keep reminding myself that it was real human bodies, not just a plastic model.  Incredible!!!  If you get the chance you should go see this exhibit.  It’s worth it and it’s not gross at all.

They show every part of the body and when they were showing the foot I kept looking to see if I could see the parts that were bothering me.  I’ve suffered with Plantar Fasciitis for a long, long time and now an inflamed bursa in my heel has been added to the list of foot problems. Only one foot I saw had the plantar fascia though.

So that was my day. I’m so glad I went, it was awesome.

the long weekend!!  Yea!!!  I have been so looking forward to this, you have no idea how much!!  I’m very, very happy.  I need to get things done but there will be time for relaxing and resting.  I have a ton of schoolwork to do, so that will be a real priority.  I want to go see the Bodies exhibit, that’s on Friday.  I need to get a haircut.  I guess that’s about it.  The list is not too long so you can see there will be lots of reading and relaxing.  Oh yeah, I’m also going to work out too.  Woo Hoo!!!!

Maybe I’ll do some shopping.  I generally stay far away from the malls on Black Friday but maybe Sunday I’ll venture out and see what’s happening. Who knows, maybe I’ll go looking for Festina watches. You just never know.

Okay, now I’ve got to go relax. I want to figure out exactly what I have to do for school and plan my weekend so I’m not sitting on Sunday evening cramming everything in. I’m off to organize…..

Last night in class we had to break into 2 groups and debate No Child Left Behind.  Our group was on the pro side.  Now, I don’t know much about NCLB and I didn’t do the required reading for class.  In our group was 8 people and only 3 had to speak.  I thought for sure someone else would jump up and take the stage.  Ummmm….no…… I ended up being one of the people who had to debate.  Now the debate part didn’t bother me.  I can get up in front of any crowd and talk, I have no problem with that.  But last night I was freaking out.  I didn’t want to do it and I was literally freaking.  When I tried to figure out why I realized it was because I didn’t know what I was talking about.  Also, there were very strict rules that had to be followed and that didn’t help either.  But the main problem was I didn’t know.  After the debate and on the way home I thought about this and realized that I am a control freak.

I am basically a very shy person, although that seems to be changing some.  I am extremely uncomfortable in new situations. The first day of class I was a nervous wreck.  The only thing that helped is that I knew all the other students were nervous wrecks too.  So we were all in the same boat and that makes it a little easier to deal.  But if I have to go into a situation where I’m the only new person, it freaks me out beyond belief.  Unless I know what I’m getting into.  So if someone has gone there before me and can tell me what to expect, that makes it a little better. When applying this to last night’s debate, I realized that since I didn’t know what I was doing (in terms of rules of debate) or what I was talking about (in terms of NCLB) I was freaked.  It was my own fault.  I knew last week that we were going to debate that this week, I just figured I’d get out of it.  If I had just read the required reading I would have been prepared a little and at least had some idea of what I was talking about.  So, lesson learned.  The lesson being that I am a control freak :)  Stepping out of your comfort zone is hard but it’s not as hard as dealing with mesothelioma, so I guess I can be thankful for that.

But, and this is an important but, it’s the last day of the work week. I have 4 days off and I need them so badly - you have no idea. I have a pile of school work to do and I’m actually looking forward to getting it done. Hope everyone has a good turkey day.

Our parrot club is putting on a fairly large event on Friday Dec 5th.  We searched a long time for a decent venue that would fit what we wanted to do and wasn’t bank breaking.  We finally find the place we like, the only drawback is we have to use the caterers that have the contract.  We have been trying for 2 months to get this caterer to call us back. The women just will not return phone calls.  I left her a message this morning (about the 20th one) saying that if I didn’t hear from her by 10:30 I would have to seek alternatives avenues.  We ended up calling her manager and anyway, we finally got to meet with her and get everything set up, but you have no idea how much I wanted to just rip her face off.  I was nice and polite because I need her to do her job so that my event will come off nice.  So really, is it too much to ask someone to just do their job???

When I was 12 we moved from New Jersey to California.  That year I started 7th grade in a new school in a strange city.  I adjusted over time but it was hard.  The following year my dad died over the summer.  I took that really hard but kept going, I had no choice.   Before school started that year we went clothes shopping.  I bought a pair of pants that were amazing.  They were crushed corduroy (you have to be of a certain age t remember those) and they were beautiful.  They were dark blue with light blue pockets.  The rear pockets had flowers embroidered on them.  These were the most amazing pants I have ever owned.  Every time I wore them I would feel like I could do anything.  I knew they looked good on me that built up my confidence like nothing else.  I wore those pants as often as I could for that whole school year. Unfortunately the next year they were too small and thus ended the tale of the world’s most amazing pants.

This afternoon we headed out to the outlet mall for a little shopping. We went in to Steve & Barry’s just to look around.  They were having an inventory liquidation and lots of things were on sale. I was specifically looking for some semi-causal shirts to wear to school.  I was looking at all the shirts and not even interested in the pants.  Then, all of  a sudden, there they were.  Dark blue, crushed corduroy pants.  I could not believe my eyes.  There were 2 pairs left and 1 was in my size.  I picked them up and looked at them.  They didn’t have the light pockets with the embroidery, but they did have snap flaps on the pockets just like the originals.  They were beautiful.  I had to get them.  As I walked around the store finishing my shopping I kept rubbing the pants.  I can’t believe I found another pair.  I’m hoping they make me feel like I did when I was 13 and hopefully I won’t need Lipovox to wear them comfortably.

I was thinking about this last night as I had to give a presentation in my class.  I had to get up in front of my class and not only give a lesson, like I’m a teacher, but talk about microscopes, like I know them.  What struck me about this whole experience is that how do I know this stuff??  Am I not just an impostor pretending to know how to do these things?  I feel that way in my job too.  People ask me questions like I’m some kind of expert.  I’m not.  Or at least I don’t think I am.  I’ve never had a big ego and in some ways thinking you’re an expert is a bit of an ego thing.  But seriously, there are days where I feel like I’m an impostor.  I don’t know how to run a house.  Take care of animals. Balance a budget.  Yet I do these things and more day after day like I know what I’m doing.  It’s funny.  I guess everyone has doubts now and then.  I’ll bet even cerebral palsy lawyers have doubts about their abilities once in a while. Anyway, I just kind of get overwhelmed with this feeling every once in a while and I had to share.  This morning I feel much better about everything. Oh yeah, and my animals love me

Lately I just haven’t had much to say.  I’m under a lot of pressure from school.  It ends in 2 weeks and I have about 4 weeks of work to complete.  Pressure………  I can’t wait for this semester to be over.  I need the break.  I plan on using the time to work with my camera.  I love my camera and I want to become proficient at it.  I also want to use the time to get the negatives/photos organized.  I’ve made a huge dent in them I want to finish the job.  Also, I may start cleaning some stuff out for the big move.  Maybe we’ll have a garage sale.  Yeah, I’m trying to cram a lot into 6 weeks

Not much else to say.  Work and school are consuming me right now.  At work the other day a faucet broke.  In a lab a broken faucet is a major crisis.  Hopefully the plumber will be here today to fix it.  I don’t think he’ll bring a selection of Grohe faucets for us to chose from, but I’m sure he’ll bring one that will work.

Time to get ready for work.