It Wasn't a Total Blackout

You Remember 90% of 2008

You were paying attention during 2008. And you remember what happened really well. You'll be able to talk about 2008 for years to come... Even when most people have forgotten what went down.

How Much Do You Remember 2008?

I guess I remember more than I thought. I woke out of my drunken haze long enough to make a few observations. For example, I remember that this picture is possibly my favorite from last year. Just let it all sink in. The gun playfully resting against the house. You know, just in case. The long necklace whimsically resting against her protruding belly. The fact that she decided to go with the sleeveless top this morning. I could go on and on. Every detail has something special about it.

Dumbass Soccer Mom

What a day I had yesterday, folks. Not in a good way, either. I promise you, the life of a bad ass soccer mom can be a lot more stressful than you think. Let me take you back to yesterday afternoon.

It was the first soccer practice since before Christmas. I was already in a bad mood because I hate to hang around with those soccer moms. Go figure! So, I obviously had to fill my pimp cup up to the brim with a little medicinal vodka this day. Most of the ladies know to back the hell off when they see my pimp cup make an appearance.

This woman, let's call her "Dumbass" (not her real name), decides to come over and talk to me. Bitch has the balls to make fun of me for walking funny. (Between you and me, I HAVE been walking funny lately. You would too if you had a Jesus ashtray involuntarily shoved up your rectum.) For a brief explanation on how this happened, click here.

Of course I wasn't about to let her know what happened to me, so I kicked her in the shin and ran off. When I say "ran" I mean hobbled really fast. Anyway, the long and short of it is that she filed charges against me for assault. Not a great way to start off the week!

I Like to Party Like a Fat Guy!

Yay! I'm back and there's nothing you can do about it!

Today is the day that I start eating better and not drinking (as much). My health kick starts right now. Do you know why I'm doing this? After eating and drinking constantly for the past two weeks, I feel like this guy:

Anyone else feel like this after the holidays?

Jesus Doesn't Smoke!

Merry Christmas to all!!!

PS-My mom is trying to stop smoking this year. Is it annoying that I put these all around the house???

Be honest! Am I taking my life into my own hands?

Is that a Reindeer on your Boob or are you Just Happy to See Me?

I'm finally almost prepared for Christmas. I like everything to be perfect! Of course I don't do my own wrapping. I send it out to CrapWrap for that homemade touch! I would recommend it to anyone who wants that extra special touch.

I've chosen a tasteful, yet festive Christmas sweater for my husband to wear.

I'm having trouble deciding between two different Christmas looks for myself. This first sweater
is a traditional beauty sure to wow everyone!

But, I was thinking of breaking with tradition and do something like this:

Thoughts???

The Other Side of Prefers Her Loony Idiot Girl in Action

I got an award from a cool blog called, "Lola's Diner". Check it out!

Here are the rules:
1. Put the logo in your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who shared it with you.
3. Pass this award to your Blogger Friends
4. Add your link to the list of participants below
5. Leave a message for your nominee on their blog.

I thought I would send this along to a couple of entertaining blogs worth checking out.

First off, my favorite blogger from Mesa, Arizona, Quirky Loon. Check her out for a good laugh!

Next, we have Meg from Prefers Her Fantasy Life. The Kiss doll on her header is worth the visit alone!!

Another blog that I had to check out just because of the name. It's called Idiot Girl in Action. How can you not love it!

A daily must read is Steven Humour. Enough said.

Last, but definitely not least is The Other Side of Normal. Anyone who names today's post, "Merry Christmas, Fuckers" is okay in my book. Did that come out wrong?

Whooooooo! Whoooooooooo!

Yesterday was secret santa day. Father Muskrat got me. He gave me "bad idea" jeans, knowing that I have a thing against mom jeans. I love my new bad idea jeans! I don't know if it's the acid wash, or the red tag up the butt or the extremely high rise part of the jean I like best. Check them out and I dare you not to laugh! Especially the Haiti part.

Saturday Night Live - Bad Idea Jeans

Father Muskrat also introduced me to my new love. His name is Bubb Rubb. I'm going to Oakland right now and lookin' me up some Bubb Rubb! Nuff said!!


Update:I am disappointed to find out that I'm not the only one with a thing for Bubb Rubb. If you look him up on youtube, you will find out that he already has a following. Where have I been? Even little kids know about him and I didn't! I have a pimp cup and everything. I also happen to be from Oakland myself and I had no idea about the never ending comedy that is Bubb Rubb and li'l sis. I mean, does she have some mad driving skillz or what??

I need to regroup and get my head out of my ass. What else have I been missing?

All I know is that I'm gonna rock the craft circle's world when I roll up with my whistle tip! Biotches!!!