In Flames won a Grammy for the best hard rock act at the Swedish Grammy Awards! Congrats to those guy. Maybe one day we will see them playing the Grammy Awards in the States…one day…one day.

If you’re not familiar with In Flames you should check them out…if you like metal. Here is the video of them playing at the Award show. They are performing Alias from their latest album. The guy that is playing acoustic with them is another musician, Timo Raisanen.

On the days that it’s not freezing cold (freezing cold to me is 65 or below) outside I try and ride the motorcycle to work. Where I work there’s an area in the parking lot designated for the cool kids (read: motorcycle riders). It’s pretty common to run into another rider and start chatting it up. This is very similar to the members of NAMBLA running into each other at the neighborhood playground except we’re not pedophiles…most of us anyway. We spend some time talking about our latest rides, the weather, comparing “If you can read this, the B*tch fell off” shirts, and also exchanging skin care tips.

One afternoon on my way out, I ran into a guy I haven’t seen before. We exchanged the generic “nice weather for a ride” and he went into how he rides his “bike” no matter what weather is like…”Well, unless there be ice on dere roads”. He keeps talking about his “bike” and I’m just nodding along. I start to look around to lot because he is talking this thing up like it’s a custom from West Coast Choppers. I don’t spot anything that would fit the hype this guy is throwing around.

So I asked him “Which one is yours?”

He pointed in the direction of a stock looking Harley Davidson, nothing impressive. Being the nice guy I am, I told him he had a “Nice Looking Harley”. He replied to me was “No, not the Harley. It’s the one behind it”. I take a second look and sure enough there it is…a freaking scooter. I’m staring at this “bike”…scooter thinking this guy is messing with me. The guy standing in front of me is the biggest Redneck I’ve encountered in recent memory. He is a few months away from losing all his teeth and has a beer gut that would put Artie Lang to shame. You know a stereotypical Harley rider. There is no way this guy is for real. Only he knows way too much about it for him to be joking. In my stupor, my only words to him were “Ahh Cool”.

Coming out of my daze I hear him talking about the repairs and modifications he’s made to the bike (At this point I want to slap him and tell him it’s a scooter). One of the repairs he had to make was to the throttle housing. Because he couldn’t find the parts for his Chinese scooter he had to use duct tape. What he did next blew me away. He looked at me and leaned towards me:

“I had to use the duct tape…”

He looks around to make sure no one is around.

“…to African-American rig the throttle.”

H-O-L-Y C-R-A-P

I couldn’t tell you what he said after that. I was completely blown away.

On my ride home (on a real bike, not a toy for a Barbie doll) I was going over what he said in my head. I can’t even tell you what this guy was thinking. He must have thought by saying “African-American rigged” he was being politically correct. It’s really more screwed up than the original saying (I don’t feel a need to post it here). With that saying you could almost (no, not really) pass it off as fixing something as an ignorant person would (term shouldn’t be used at all and I’m making no excuses for someone using it). He implies that all black people are known for fixing things in a cheap and incorrect way. Idiot!

I don’t think I’ve ever been that close to a racist asshole before (The only thing that stands out was someone yelling “Hey OJ!” to My Mom, Step dad, and I while driving around D.C.). Racists are one of those things I don’t quite understand and don’t think I ever will.

The thing that terrifies me about this whole encounter, this guy probably has offspring running around. Those little bastards are going to knock up their cousins and then teach their mutant siblings the same ignorant crap. The government really needs to start enforcing the no inbreeding laws. If not, we will be over run by these hicks and they will replace our water supply with Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator (Referring to the Mike Judge film, Idiocracy). But the government won’t step in. They know if they did we would run out of politicians.

Yesterday, we said goodbye to 2008 and “How you doooin’?” to 2009. Last year was quite a busy one for me. When I say busy, I’m comparing it to previous years where I did nothing other than scratch my butt and sniff my fingers. That’s only fun for so long!

I thought I would recap some of the cool things that went on last year. Hopefully I can keep the momentum going and have even a better 2009.

• For my birthday last year my family presented me with a film class. The class ran from January 22 to April-something. We had to write a script and then as a class we decide which ones were going to get made. Andrea, my sister, was taking the class with me. We both decided we wanted to make our scripts. My film feel apart trying to look for locations. After that Andrea asked me to direct her short, Socially. Long story, short. We found the cast and filmed in early March. The short premeired to all of the other film classes on April 26th. Great experience.

• Next up was the SXSW film festival. I didn’t fully emerge myself in the experience because I had to work most of the week. But it was my first time since living in Austin that I actually experienced SXSW…other than the traffic. The biggest highlight, besides all the movies, was seeing the cast of Harold and Kumar. NPH (Neil Patrick Harris) is funny as hell!
• In May, we traveled to Savannah, Georgia to Charleston, SC and then to Mrytle Beach, SC. It was great seeing family members that I haven’t seen in a long time. I was pumped to go to Savannah only to be let down. It had some beautiful things to see but overall the place is a dump…think New Orleans but less puke and piss. I did have the best Guiness of my life at some Irish pub we came across. It was also on this trip that Alev and I decided that we were going to move to Raleigh, NC in the next year. We had done this before but we were determined.
• Operation ‘Get the F*** Out of Our House’ was in full effect. It was the biggest road block in us moving to the east cost. When we got back from our trip we hit the ground running. We fixed it up and put it on the market. Sucker sold quick!! I’m in no rush to buy another house anytime soon.
• We saw some changes in the transportation department. We got rid of the crap box that was our 1999 Tahoe (quick friendly reminder, even family members will dick you over) and replaced it with a 2006 Chrysler Pacifica. I also purchased my first Harley Davidson, a 2008 Nightster. Looking back at the bike purchase, not the smartest thing to do but oh well. That is something I’m known for doing.

• With little time left in Austin we wanted to make sure we did as much as possible with friends. Generally Alev and I are homebodies. When asked if we want to go out we would make up an excuse of why we couldn’t. But that is something we don’t like and have been working on for the past year or so. With that said, we made sure we didn’t pass any opportunity to do anything we friends. Even if we had to fight the urge to sit on our asses. We had some AWESOME times.  Too many pictures to pick through. But I will post the one I like best. It’s from Tubing for Nikka’s Bday. She had too much to drink.
• 
• I got 2nd place for BBQ sauce in my companies annual BBQ cookoff. First time making a sauce! Whaddup!
• I experienced my first deep sea fishing trip. Sharon, Alev, Eric, and I headed down to South Padre for a weekend. We caught some kingfish and took them to a restaurant to cook up for us. Good times…no Great Times!!!

• After talking about it for years and years, we finally moved to Raleigh, NC. This is by far the biggest thing to happen this year. Everything feel into place and we made the move. Originally we planned to move sometime in 2009. If we had put it off till then we probably would not followed through with it. But we did move and we love it some far. Now we just need to get all of our friends to move up here and we’ll be set.

• We ended the year having an awesome Christmas. For the first time ever my family didn’t give any gifts to each other. We’ve been known to spend way too much money on past Christmases. So with our move, economy, and just cause we decided not to buy any gifts and it was the best ever. Zero stress. Bank account looks no worse than normal. We just enjoyed each others company and played some board games and Scene it! on the 360.

There you have it, a brief review of my year. I had a lot of great experiences this past year and I could be here all day writing about them. But that’s not going to happen. Just know it was a great year for me (not including the part where Andrea and I weren’t talking for a few months and missed out on spending time together before I left Austin). I only hope 2009 will be even better.

Happy New Year!

Do you have nothing else better to do? Check out this great cover of Enter Sandman on the Kazoo. It starts off kind of slow but it gets awesome..er..awesomer.

Metallica would be stupid not to invite this guy to join the band. This could return them to the great days of Ride the Lightning and Cliff Burton.

Earlier this year a co-worker sent me a link and suggested that I try Twitter. Even before signing up for an account I really couldn’t grasp the concept of the tool. Is it meant to be a sort of mini blog or another way to let friends know when a new pimple pops up on my ass. It’s hard to tell. I haven’t seen any two people use it the same way.

Since I don’t see many using it as a mini blog, I’m going to assume it’s a way to keep their friends in the loop with their happenings. Which seems kind of stupid. Do I really want to know when someones walks into a gym, is in line to buy Hannah Montana tickets, or stubs their toe.  Sooner or later it’s going to progress and they’re going to start twitting…twitted…tweet…posting every little detail about them you don’t want to know. 

Let me show you the future of Twitter by taking you through a normal Saturday in my life. 

SirRobbieRob I’m at Five Guys eating the greasiest burger known to man. I’m probably going to regret this later about 8 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob Having some serious cramps going on. These could probably be consider contractions. I think I’m having a baby…a butt baby. about 7 hours ago from twitterberry

SirRobbieRob The cold sweats have started. I really have to go the bathroom but holding out. In a weird way it feels really good holding it in. Like really, really good. about 7 hours ago from the web

SirRobbieRob Sweet baby Jesus! It’s been blasting out for 25 minutes non stop. This could be the WMD Bush was looking for. about 6 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob It’s over!!! Thank God! Time to start cleaning up. Hopefully we have enough TP. about 6 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob Jump the gun. Its going again. This isn’t humanly possibly. No one is full of this much shit. about 6 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob If someone is reading this, please help. I’ve lost all muscle control and can’t stop. I may pass out soon. about 6 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob I’ve been wiping on and off for 15 minutes. My ass is really sore, probably going to get a hemroid. I need to remind Alev to buy some baby wipes. about 6 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob ewww I got poo on my finger. Does this day get any worse. about 5 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob Yes, yes it does. I just gave myself a dirty sanchez… about 5 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob Clean up is done. My ass is sore. All I smell is poo. about 5 hours ago from the twitterberry

SirRobbieRob I’m exhausted and going to take a nap. Thanks to twitter I didn’t have to go thru this nightmare alone. about 4 hours ago from the twitterberry

Besides my stalker (Merry Christmas John!), does anyone really want that much detail about my life. I know I don’t want to know that much about yours…unless you’re a cool celebrity like David Spade or Fabio. 

Maybe that’s it! We all want to be a cool celebrity like David Spade and like thinking people give a crap about our happenings and whereabouts. If that’s the case,  I have a better idea than twitter.

How about a Rent-A-Stalker service?  (I can’t take credit for this idea. It’s all my stalker’s idea. Thanks John and don’t worry, I ‘m working on that restraining order. Should be ready by XMas.) You would have someone to follow you everywhere and , if you choose (additional fee), kill you on your front lawn. This service would allow you the opportunity to live a life similar to Paula Abdul or Madonna…without the money of course. 

Rent-A-Stalker…the new twitter! Ch-Ching

Happy Holidays!

If you get a minute, post a comment about your thoughts on twitter and how you use it.

If you ARE interested in knowing about my bathroom habits, feel free to head over to Twitter and follow me; http://twitter.com/SirRobbieRob